It’s hard to see where I’m at in this process. It’s still all fresh and new that it’s hard to even realize that tomorrow it will have been 8 weeks since I gave birth to Jonah. One thing I am certain of, is that I am not the same person I was. People have said to me that they miss the old me and that want to see me happy again. I promise you that I will be happy again someday – not today or tomorrow, but sometime. Even though the tears have stopped flowing continuously and my body has physically healed, it does not mean my heart has. My heart is still aching with every breathe and every moment passing. Everyday I still have to find the courage to get out of bed in the morning and face the world and all of its reminders that I’m not pregnant anymore and Jonah isn’t in my arms. Every thought that goes through my head brings me back to him and our short time together.
My heart will always beat for the both of us, Jonah.