‘I’m tired. I’m worn. My heart is heavy. From the work it takes to keep on breathing.’

I’m sure the world around me expects me to ‘be able to function’ and close enough to ‘back to normal’ by now. I’m not though. Every moment and every part of my being aches for Jonah. I don’t cry all day like I use to, but my heart aches. Sometimes I wish I would just cry all day instead of having this heaviness on my heart. When I’m at home and I’m all alone, I lay on the floor and curl up in a ball and pray. I pray for better days and happier times. I pray that someday I will learn to live with my heartache. Most of all, I pray for Jonah.


6 thoughts on “Worn

  1. I totally get that – for me it feel like a little baby sized weight on my heart, constantly reminding me that there’s something missing. The only way I can see of learning how to live with it is to make room for the pain, and use it to try remember that this world isn’t home. Where my little one is is home, and I long for it now in a way I never did before. I think that’s my new ‘normal’.

  2. I love Tenth Avenue North and this song. I have been listening to this song and relating to it too. Such a gift from God, songs that say what our heart is feeling and let us know we are not alone in it.

    • I love them too. My mother-in-law gave me their CD right after Jonah died. I have a huge playlist on my iphone dedicated to Jonah. Music has helped me tremendously on this journey. Sometimes I can hear a song come on the radio and I swear God played that song just for me because it hit home with me so much. You’ll have to tell me a song you like to listen too! I also love “Homesick” by Mercy Me

  3. I will pray for you to have the strength to go on, the courage to continue God’s plan for your life, & the peace & joy of knowing he is with Jesus, as is promised in His Word.

    Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Matthew 19:14

    God bless you!

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