i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)

A few weeks ago when I went to Chicago and I did something I thought I would never do.

I got my first tattoo.

I’ve always thought tattoos were neat, but I could never pin point something that I wanted on my body the rest of my life. I’d think, “Would I still like this when I was old, wrinkly and gray?” Probably not. But for many months, I talked to my best friend, Julia, about how it was something I wanted to do and we planned to go together when I got to Chicago.

Now I knew there were a few things I wanted out of this tattoo. I wanted Jonah’s name (not just a J because my last name is Johnson) and I want it to be on my wrist facing me. I wanted to be able to look down every single day for the rest of my life and be reminded of the sad times and also the happy times with Jonah. I want to be able to look down and smile too.

My dad couldn’t believe I went through with it considering the location and the pain, but it didn’t hurt. I have gone through more pain this year then most do in a lifetime.

All in all, I want to carry Jonah with me.

I carry him in my heart.



12 thoughts on “i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)

  1. You are so cool. I kinda want one, but then Blythe would insist on her name too, and I want more kids, so then I’d feel bad… I overthink things, can you tell? I would love an anchor actually, but I don’t know where

    It looks great, I love it.

    • Thanks 🙂 I have thought about that too and it does seem more difficult on your end with Blythe. I figured I would tell my kids someday that I didn’t get to watch Jonah grow up and it made me very sad. So I wanted a reminder to look at. That way, every time I was doing something I would think about what it would be like if Jonah was doing it with me. Hopefully my other kids someday understand and don’t come home with a bunch of tattoos because their mom has one! I thought about that too! Lol. I was going to just do an anchor too. They are beautiful and if you look up pictures of anchor wrist tattoos on Pinterest – there are so many beautiful ones!

      • Which is perfectly logical and reasonable, which are two things most six year olds aren’t lol. I always have to be careful of appearing to love taidgh more.

        I thought I’d seen one with ‘my anchor holds within the veil on it’ but now I can’t find it. I may ask my friend who did the lettering on taidgh’s box to work on something.

      • I have never thought of your grief that way. Every second of my grief, I live out loud and I never thought how you have to be sensitive to Blythe. Sometimes I have to remind myself to show love to others. I feel extremely selfish lately. But you are so strong. Blythe seems wise for her age too. She is a good older sister to Taidgh and she is blessed to have you 🙂

  2. This is a great tribute to Jonah. I am so proud of you for doing it, I never would be able to get a tattoo. I want one with Emma in it but am to chicken. Your future children will understand and be proud of you too! Love ya

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